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Around Town: Critic's Pick

Best Public Place to Have Sex

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San Antonio Botanical Gardens
555 Funston, (210) 207-3250, sabot.org

Feeling exhibitionist? Too randy to make it home? Digs not suited for bangin’? If you’re caught, sex in public is a Class A misdemeanor, meaning a fine of up to $4,000 and up to a year in the big house. But if Uncle Sam’s discipline adds to the act’s kinkiness, appease that public lust at the San Antonio Botanical Gardens. Try the East Texas Pineywoods area for some backwoods lovin’, or the futuristic Palm and Cycad Pavilion for getting weird in a utopian, tropical setting. Whatever you’re looking for, SABOT offers several backdrops for bumpin’ uglies, from vaguely secluded to all-out on display. But please, check your plant allergies first and avoid the children’s vegetable garden.

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