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Savage Love: The clit’s the thing

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Imagine the flip side, Brooklyn: Your new girlfriend pays no attention to the head of your cock during sex; the most she can be bothered to do is provide you with a little “indirect stimulation.” Maybe she nudges the side of your dick with her foot while you eat her to orgasm after orgasm. While you might enjoy this activity (especially if you’re a foot fetishist), it probably won’t get you off. You’re having fun, you’re enjoying yourself, but you’re not having orgasms. Eventually, you pull your slimy face out of her crotch and ask for some direct cock-head stimulation. Your girlfriend recoils in horror. She insists that ALL her previous boyfriends could climax from indirect cock-nudging alone. “What is wrong with you?” she asks.

How would you react to that, Brooklyn? Probably like this: You would get up, get dressed, tell her she’s full of shit—delusional—and inform her on your way out the door that all of her previous boyfriends were liars. You wouldn’t settle for indirect stimulation—so why should your girlfriends have to settle for indirect stimulation?

I’m going to let you off the hook just a bit: You most likely aren’t entirely responsible for your ignorance or your predicament. The women you’ve slept with up to this point may have contributed to your ignorance. A lot of women, when they first start having sex, believe they should be able to have orgasms from intercourse alone—because that’s the way women’s orgasms seem to work in movies, porn and romance novels, and, funnily enough, it’s the way their ill-informed young boyfriends insist women’s orgasms work. Consequently, some young women psych themselves out, convincing themselves that they’re having orgasms while their boyfriends huff and puff; other women fake orgasms for fear that their boyfriends will think they’re damaged goods if they can’t come from intercourse alone.

Since inexperienced young women tend to have sex with inexperienced young men, these psyched/faked orgasms can leave young men with a false impression of the way women’s bodies work and, sadly, of their own sexual abilities. Bad-in-bed boys bop through their sex lives until the earth-shattering moment when they find themselves in bed with a woman who insists on a little hand action or a lot of oral sex. When a boy finds himself in bed with a woman who demands that her orgasm (and her clit) play as central a role in the sex act as his orgasm (and the head of his dick), these boys—these dear, sweet, darling breeder boys—freak the fuck out. They think the new girlfriend is some sort of psychotic nympho, or, like you, they think their lovemaking skills have deteriorated or their cocks suddenly aren’t big enough.

But the new girlfriend isn’t a psychotic nympho. She’s just not a doormat. And the boy’s lovemaking skills haven’t deteriorated—they never developed in the first place. And as for your particular cock, Brooklyn, it may be too big, too small or just right, but almost all women need stimulation in addition to fucking to achieve orgasm, regardless of their manfriend’s cock size. So the size of your pee-pee doesn’t matter all that friggin’ much, except, perhaps, aesthetically.

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